TechnologyTwo-part
IELTS Essay: The Rise of Online Shopping (Band 9 vs 6.5)
In short
Below is a full Band 9 model answer to this IELTS Writing Task 2 question, the same question written at Band 6.5, and a criterion-by-criterion breakdown of exactly what separates them — so you can see what to change in your own writing. Then check your essay with the free tool.
The question
In many countries, people are increasingly buying products online rather than in physical shops. Why is this happening? Is it a positive or negative development?
How to approach a Two-part question
A two-part question contains two direct questions; you must answer both, and roughly equally. Plan one body paragraph per question so neither is neglected — writing 200 words on the first part and 50 on the second is a common way to lose Task Response marks even when the English is strong.
The plan
- 01Introduction: paraphrase the shift to online shopping and preview both answers — convenience and price drive it, and it is broadly positive despite costs to high streets.
- 02Body 1 (why): round-the-clock convenience, lower prices from reduced overheads, and vastly wider choice with reviews and comparison.
- 03Body 2 (evaluation): positive on balance — access and competition benefits — while conceding harm to local shops and jobs.
- 04Conclusion: summarise the causes and restate the mainly positive verdict.
Band 9 model answer
Across much of the world, the weekly trip to the shops is quietly giving way to a few taps on a phone. This essay will first explain why online purchasing has grown so rapidly, and then argue that, despite real damage to traditional retailers, it is on balance a positive development.
The causes are not mysterious. Online stores are open around the clock, which suits populations that increasingly work irregular hours; a purchase that once consumed a Saturday morning now takes minutes. Prices are also typically lower, since e-commerce firms carry no expensive high-street rents and pass some of the savings on. Perhaps most decisively, the internet offers a breadth of choice no physical shop can match, complete with customer reviews and instant price comparison — the shopper arrives better informed than any salesperson could make them.
Whether this amounts to progress is more contested, but I believe it does. The clearest losers are town-centre shops and the people they employ, and hollowed-out high streets are a genuine social cost that governments should cushion. Yet the gains are broader and deeper: elderly and rural consumers gain access to goods they could never previously reach, small producers can now sell nationwide without a shopfront, and relentless price competition leaves ordinary households with more money for other needs. A change that widens access and lowers prices for the many, while harming a specific sector, is better managed than resisted.
In conclusion, online shopping has flourished because it is cheaper, endlessly convenient and richer in choice than the high street. Although the decline of physical retail brings real casualties, the overall effect — broader access and stronger competition — makes this a largely positive development.
The same question at Band 6.5
Nowadays, more and more people prefer to buy things on the internet instead of going to the shops. In this essay I will explain the reasons of this trend and give my opinion about whether it is positive or negative.
There are several reasons why online shopping is becoming popular. The first reason is that it is very convenient. People can buy anything at any time, even at midnight, and they do not need to drive to the shopping mall and find a parking. The second reason is the price. Online shops are usually cheaper than normal shops because they do not need to pay for the building and many staff. Finally, on the internet people can find many different products from other countries, and they can read the reviews from other customers before they buy.
In my opinion, this development is positive, but it also has some negative sides. It is positive because it saves time and money for the customers, and old people or people in small villages can buy things that they cannot find in their local shops. However, it is negative for the traditional shops. Many small shops are closing because they cannot compete with the big websites, and the workers lose their jobs. Also, some people buy too many things online because it is too easy, and they waste their money.
In conclusion, people shop online because it is convenient, cheap and has many choices. I think it is a positive development in general, but the government should help the small shops to survive in this new situation.
What separates them, criterion by criterion
| Criterion | Band 9 | Band 6.5 |
|---|---|---|
| Task Response | Answers both questions fully and in balance: three developed causes, then a genuine evaluation that weighs losers against winners before reaching a verdict. | Both parts are answered, but the second is a list of one positive and two negatives with the verdict asserted rather than argued. |
| Coherence & Cohesion | The essay is mapped in the introduction and each paragraph delivers one part; linking is varied and natural ('Perhaps most decisively', 'Yet the gains are broader'). | Clear structure and paragraphing, but sequencing leans on 'The first reason', 'The second reason', 'Finally', and the opinion paragraph mixes positives and negatives loosely. |
| Lexical Resource | Topic-specific, natural collocation: 'hollowed-out high streets', 'relentless price competition', 'giving way to a few taps on a phone'. | Adequate everyday vocabulary with repetition ('shops', 'cheap', 'buy things') and minor awkwardness ('the reasons of this trend', 'find a parking'). |
| Grammatical Range & Accuracy | Complex sentences handled accurately throughout, including concession and relative structures; errors are absent. | Reasonable control of simple and compound forms; recurring small errors ('the reasons of', 'a parking') and limited subordination cap the score. |
Examiner's note
Two-part questions are lost most often on balance, and both essays avoid that trap by giving each question its own paragraph. What separates them is the quality of the evaluation: the Band 9 treats 'positive or negative?' as an argument to be won — conceding the harm to high streets and explaining why the gains still dominate — while the Band 6.5 simply sorts effects into positive and negative piles. The vocabulary gap ('hollowed-out high streets' versus 'shops are closing') compounds the difference.
Vocabulary from the Band 9 answer
| Word / phrase | Meaning |
|---|---|
| to give way to | to be gradually replaced by something newer |
| around the clock | available twenty-four hours a day |
| overheads | the fixed running costs of a business, such as rent |
| breadth of choice | a very wide range of options |
| a hollowed-out high street | a town shopping area emptied of its shops and activity |
| to cushion a cost | to reduce the painful impact of a negative change |
| relentless competition | competitive pressure that never eases |
| casualties of change | the people or businesses harmed when things change |
| better managed than resisted | wiser to guide a change than to try to stop it |
Frequently asked questions
How should I split a two-part question across paragraphs?
One body paragraph per question, roughly equal in length. Answer the first question ('why?') with two or three developed causes, and the second ('positive or negative?') with a clear verdict that you argue, not just state. Neglecting either part costs Task Response marks.
Can I say a development is both positive and negative?
You can acknowledge both sides, but the strongest answers still commit to an overall verdict — 'positive on balance' or 'mainly negative'. An answer that refuses to decide reads as fence-sitting and limits Task Response.
Do I need to know e-commerce statistics for this topic?
No. Examiners assess your English and reasoning, not your data. General, plausible observations — lower overheads, wider choice, closing high-street shops — are entirely sufficient support.