EnvironmentTwo-part
IELTS Essay: Why Species Become Extinct (Band 9 vs 6.5)
In short
Below is a full Band 9 model answer to this IELTS Writing Task 2 question, the same question written at Band 6.5, and a criterion-by-criterion breakdown of exactly what separates them — so you can see what to change in your own writing. Then check your essay with the free tool.
The question
Many species of plants and animals are disappearing from the planet at an alarming rate. Why is this happening, and what measures could be taken to address the problem?
How to approach a Two-part question
A two-part question contains two direct questions; you must answer both, and roughly equally. Plan one body paragraph per question so neither is neglected — writing 200 words on the first part and 50 on the second is a common way to lose Task Response marks even when the English is strong.
The plan
- 01Introduction: paraphrase the biodiversity-loss statement and signal that causes and remedies will follow
- 02Body 1: causes - habitat destruction, climate change, the illegal wildlife trade, and pollution
- 03Body 2: remedies - protected reserves, tough anti-poaching laws, and international cooperation
- 04Conclusion: summarise the causes and remedies and stress the need for global collaboration
Band 9 model answer
The world is currently witnessing a dramatic decline in biodiversity, with countless species of plants and animals vanishing far faster than at almost any point in recent history. This essay will explore the underlying causes of these losses and suggest how the alarming trend might be curbed.
Human activity lies at the very heart of the crisis. As forests are cleared for farmland and cities sprawl ever outward, the natural habitats on which wildlife depends are being destroyed at a relentless pace. On top of this, a rapidly warming climate is disrupting delicate ecosystems faster than many organisms can adapt, while the illegal trade in ivory, exotic pets and rare timber pushes numerous vulnerable species closer to the brink. In many regions the accidental introduction of invasive species tips the balance still further against native wildlife, and pollution and overfishing only compound these mounting pressures.
Reversing this trajectory calls for concerted intervention on several levels. Establishing and properly funding protected reserves would give threatened populations the space they need to recover, and enforcing tough anti-poaching laws would deter those who profit from the wildlife trade. Funding scientific research and captive-breeding programmes offers a further lifeline to species already teetering on the edge. Because extinction respects no borders, international cooperation is indispensable; binding treaties that commit nations to ambitious conservation targets can coordinate these efforts on a genuinely global scale.
In conclusion, species are disappearing chiefly because of habitat loss, climate change and human exploitation. Only through a combination of well-managed protected areas, robust legislation and genuine international collaboration can we realistically hope to safeguard the planet's remaining biodiversity for future generations.
The same question at Band 6.5
Nowadays many kind of animals and plants are disappear from the earth very quickly, and this is a serious problem for all of us. In this essay I will explain why this is happening, and what we can do to stop it.
Firstly, there are many reasons why the species become extinct. The main reason is that humans destroy their home. For example, people cut down the forests to build houses and farms, so the animals do not have place to live anymore. Also, the climate change make the weather very hot, and this affect many animals and plants who can not live in this new condition. Another reason is that some people hunt the animals to sell them for money.
Secondly, the pollution is also a big problem. The water and the air is dirty because of the factories, and this is not good for the animals, specially the fish in the sea and the birds. Also the plastic in the ocean kill many sea animals like the turtles who eat it by mistake.
To solve this problem, the government can make national park where the animals can live safely. They should also make strong law to punish the people who hunt the animals illegaly. Moreover, all the countries in the world must work together, because this problem is not only for one country. They can also make program to teach the children in the school about why we must protect the nature. In conclusion, if we protect their home and stop the hunting, we can save many species for the next generation.
What separates them, criterion by criterion
| Criterion | Band 9 | Band 6.5 |
|---|---|---|
| Task Response | Answers both parts fully, giving several developed causes and concrete, well-explained remedies for each side of the question. | Answers both questions but keeps explanations general, e.g. 'the pollution is also a big problem' with little supporting detail. |
| Coherence & Cohesion | Ideas connect naturally ('On top of this', 'Because extinction respects no borders') without formulaic sequencing. | Leans on mechanical markers ('Firstly', 'Secondly', 'Moreover', 'To solve this problem') to organise the answer. |
| Lexical Resource | Precise collocation: 'decline in biodiversity', 'disrupting delicate ecosystems', 'anti-poaching laws'. | High-frequency, repeated words - 'animals', 'problem' and 'home' - with a limited range. |
| Grammatical Range & Accuracy | A wide range of accurate complex structures, including cause-effect and relative clauses. | Mainly simple sentences with recurrent errors ('are disappear', 'climate change make', 'many kind of'). |
Examiner's note
The Band 9 essay is stronger across every criterion: it answers both questions with well-developed ideas, links them with natural cohesion, and shows a wide, accurate grammatical range alongside precise lexis. The 6.5 response covers the same ground clearly but stays general, sequences ideas mechanically, and repeats basic vocabulary while making recurrent grammar errors such as 'are disappear' and 'climate change make'.
Vocabulary from the Band 9 answer
| Word / phrase | Meaning |
|---|---|
| a decline in biodiversity | a fall in the variety of living species in an area or on the planet |
| natural habitats | the environments in which wild plants and animals naturally live |
| at a relentless pace | continuously and without slowing down or stopping |
| disrupting delicate ecosystems | upsetting finely balanced natural systems of living things |
| push species to the brink | bring species very close to disaster, in this case extinction |
| concerted intervention | coordinated, deliberate action taken to change a situation |
| anti-poaching laws | laws that prohibit the illegal hunting or capture of protected animals |
| safeguard biodiversity | protect the variety of plant and animal life from harm |
Frequently asked questions
What is a two-part (direct) question?
It asks two separate questions - here, 'why' and 'what can be done' - and you must answer both fully, because ignoring one part caps your Task Response band.
Do I need to give my opinion in a two-part question?
Only if the prompt asks for one. This type usually just requires you to answer the two questions clearly rather than argue a personal stance.
How should I organise the answer?
The cleanest structure is one body paragraph per question, so each of the two tasks receives equal, well-developed attention.