Crime & LawProblem–Solution
IELTS Essay: Rising Youth Crime in Cities (Band 9 vs 6.5)
In short
Below is a full Band 9 model answer to this IELTS Writing Task 2 question, the same question written at Band 6.5, and a criterion-by-criterion breakdown of exactly what separates them — so you can see what to change in your own writing. Then check your essay with the free tool.
The question
In many cities around the world, crime committed by young people is on the rise. What are the causes of this trend, and what measures can be taken to tackle it?
How to approach a Problem–Solution question
A problem/solution question needs realistic causes or problems in one body paragraph and directly matching solutions in the other. Keep the two linked — each solution should address a problem you actually raised — and be specific: vague answers like 'the government should do more' score poorly compared with concrete, plausible measures.
The plan
- 01Introduction: introduce rising urban youth crime and preview the causes and measures to follow.
- 02Body 1 (causes): socioeconomic deprivation, weak family supervision and the online glamorisation of crime.
- 03Body 2 (solutions): investment in deprived areas, early school intervention and mentoring, and restorative justice.
- 04Conclusion: restate the main causes and the matching measures as a credible way to reverse the trend.
Band 9 model answer
Urban centres in many parts of the world are grappling with a marked increase in offending among young people, a development that unsettles residents and authorities alike. This essay will examine the principal drivers of this trend before proposing measures that could realistically curb it.
Several intertwined factors lie behind youth crime. Chief among them is socioeconomic deprivation: adolescents who grow up amid poverty and unemployment, with few legitimate routes to status or income, may drift towards gangs that offer both belonging and quick money. A breakdown in family supervision aggravates the problem, since children left largely to their own devices absorb their values from peers and social media rather than from responsible adults. Compounding all of this is the glamorisation of criminal lifestyles online, which can make lawbreaking appear both lucrative and aspirational to impressionable minds.
Tackling this trend requires effort on complementary fronts. Governments should invest in deprived neighbourhoods through youth centres, sports schemes and apprenticeships that give teenagers a constructive alternative to the street and a genuine stake in their future. Schools, meanwhile, can identify at-risk pupils early and pair them with mentors who model law-abiding ambition. Where offences do occur, restorative justice programmes that confront young offenders with the consequences of their actions tend to reform behaviour far more effectively than a custodial record that merely entrenches a criminal identity.
In conclusion, youth crime in cities springs chiefly from deprivation, weak family supervision and the online glorification of offending. A combination of targeted investment, early school intervention and restorative justice offers the most promising route to reversing the trend and steering young people towards lawful lives.
The same question at Band 6.5
These days, crime by young people is increasing in many big cities and it become a serious problem for the society. There are different reasons for this situation and also some solutions. In this essay I will explain the main causes and I will suggest what we can do about it.
There are many reasons for youth crime. Firstly, a lot of young people are poor and they don't have a job, so they do crime to get money. Also, some of them join a bad group of friends and these friends teach them to do wrong things. Secondly, many parents are very busy with their work, so they don't have time for their children and the children do what they want without control. In addition, on the internet young people see many bad things and they think that crime is cool and easy.
There are some solutions to reduce this problem. Firstly, the government should give more money to poor area and build sport centre and clubs for young people, so they have something good to do in their free time. Also, the school should teach them about the law and give them a good advice. Secondly, the parents must spend more time with their children and check what they do. If young people get more attention and more opportunity, they will not go to the wrong way.
In conclusion, young people do crime because of poverty, bad friends and the lack of attention from parents. I think if the government and the family work together and give young people more support, the youth crime in cities will go down.
What separates them, criterion by criterion
| Criterion | Band 9 | Band 6.5 |
|---|---|---|
| Task Response | Identifies clear, distinct causes (deprivation, weak family supervision, online glamorisation) and matches each with a targeted, realistic measure. | Names real causes and solutions but leaves them general, e.g. 'they do crime to get money', without developing the mechanism behind them. |
| Coherence & Cohesion | Ideas link through meaning ('Compounding all of this is the glamorisation of criminal lifestyles', 'Tackling this trend requires effort on complementary fronts', 'Where offences do occur'). | Leans on 'Firstly', 'Also', 'Secondly' and 'In addition' to list points rather than genuinely connecting them. |
| Lexical Resource | Precise topic collocation: 'socioeconomic deprivation', 'restorative justice programmes' and 'entrenches a criminal identity'. | Repeats 'crime', 'young people' and 'problem' and stays with everyday, high-frequency words. |
| Grammatical Range & Accuracy | Varied, accurate complex sentences, e.g. 'children left largely to their own devices absorb their values from peers and social media'. | Simple structures with errors such as 'it become a serious problem', 'poor area', 'a good advice' and 'more opportunity'. |
Examiner's note
The Band 9 answer pairs sharply defined causes with matching, realistic solutions and conveys them through precise collocation and accurate complex structures. The Band 6.5 response covers the same ground clearly, but its ideas stay general, its linkers are mechanical, and repeated errors such as 'it become' and 'a good advice' keep it around Band 6.5.
Vocabulary from the Band 9 answer
| Word / phrase | Meaning |
|---|---|
| socioeconomic deprivation | a lack of money, jobs and opportunities in a community |
| few legitimate routes to status or income | limited lawful ways to gain respect or earn money |
| drift towards gangs | gradually become involved with criminal groups |
| a breakdown in family supervision | a serious failure of parents to watch over their children |
| the glamorisation of criminal lifestyles | making a life of crime look attractive or exciting |
| a constructive alternative to the street | a positive option instead of idling in trouble outside |
| restorative justice programmes | schemes that make offenders face and repair the harm they caused |
| entrenches a criminal identity | firmly fixes someone in the role of a criminal |
Frequently asked questions
How should I organise a causes-and-solutions essay?
The clearest structure is one body paragraph on the causes and a second on the solutions, ideally with each solution answering a cause you raised. Keep the two paragraphs balanced so neither the analysis nor the remedies feels rushed.
How many causes and solutions should I give?
Two or three well-developed points in each paragraph score better than a long, shallow list. For every solution, say what should be done, who should do it, and why it would work.
Do I need real statistics or examples?
No. Examiners do not check facts, and invented statistics can look unconvincing. A clearly explained, plausible example or a logical consequence supports your argument perfectly well.